Week 36 (Sept. 2-8): 'We Don't Talk About It"

Every family has their secrets, the topics that, when raised, receive the response 'we don't talk about it'.  It may be a scandal in the family, a story of disaster or a tragedy, but every family has those topics that are spoken of only in whispers, or not at all.

One such topic I discovered when I first began asking about my family history was that of my great uncle Norman Clark.  I have written about Norman several times regarding his tragic death in a shark attack in 1930, when Norman was just 19 years old.

It was my grandmother, Norman's sister Gladys, who first told me he was a forbidden topic.  As I started informally gathering names, dates and stories in my late teens, I only had one surviving grandparent, my mother's mother Gladys Daisy Pummeroy (nee Clark).  When I first asked about her siblings, the only thing she would tell me about Norman was that he died at 19, it was very upsetting, and no one liked to talk about what happened.  She also insisted I promise NEVER to question her youngest brother Russell about it.  I duly promised.

Great Uncle Russell was an enthusiastic letter writer, and he and I corresponded for a number of years.  While he was the source of many stories about the family, especially my mother during her childhood, he only raised the subject of his brother Norman once.  While discussing his siblings (there were 12 Clark children, plus 2 half siblings from their father's first marriage) he commented 'and you know about what happened to Normie'.  I responded that I knew he died at 19 and Grandma had made me promise not to ask about him.  The following is his response in his next letter.

Norman was the villain of the family. When he was 15 he was placed in the Tally Ho Boys Home where he remained to my knowledge several years. I can remember Mother taking Lennie and I to visit him at times by horse and wagon. I believe he was kept there until he was 18, but eventually came back home.

I rather idolized Norman and used to follow him around. I got up to all sorts of tricks such as stealing fruit from trees, playing truant from school and other things.

Norman was taken by a shark a few months after he came home.  I saw it happen and ran home to tell Mother “Normie’s been taken by a shark”.  She didn’t believe me until the police came.

After the shark incident my Mother’s words were “It was an act of God”.  Norman was bad but a brother I shall never forget.

The subject of Norman and his tragic death was never raised again.  'We don't talk about it'.